Living in the country, although I’m not a farmer, I’m farming something… God only knows what. Probably patience.

We moved into the Mayacamas Mountains, knowing that Internet was going to be a bit slower. Having had Comcast and having to switch to AT&T, we didn’t know service was also going to be slower; although, we were warned.

One of my very last blog posts had me declaring: Returning From a Hiatus ~ The Wines that Awaited, while some were just handy to enjoy.

Yeah, that was super terrific. I then had only three new entries and our internet and phone line with AT&A, which had been flickering since coming in, finally bit the dust on November 3. It took us back down with it.

And so the daily persistent cellphone calls began. Jose got some very imaginable excuse… Each person on the same day, within minutes of each other, had some new and interesting reason.

  • EXCUSE #1: Your line is down, we’re giving you an appointment, we’ll call to tell you when, and have a blessed day. (What?)
    • The return call hours later… You have an appointment for November 9, between 8:00 a.m. and 12:00 p.m.
      • Jose made many calls after that, on that day.
      • They all ended in “and have a blessed day.”
      • Jose called every single day after that, until November 9. (He should win a persistence prize.)
    • November 9, no one arrived. The calls began again, after we had had many a blessed day, but no phone service.
    • November 10 ~ sorry, we’ll be there tomorrow, and have a blessed day.
      • I pulled the “I told you so.”
    • November 11 ~ Sorry, we’ll get there sometime, we don’t have a clue when now, into the foreseeable future, and have a blessed day.
  • EXCUSE #2: The rain you had wiped out a slew of people in your area, and we’ve sent a crew from LA to fix your situation. It’s not just you, sir. We’re swamped. (There went the hope, and have a blessed day.)
  • EXCUSE #3: Fiber optics were cut. It has thousands of lines within the tubing, so we’re trying to find that just right one line, and do have a blessed day.

On Friday the 11th, in the afternoon, driving back from going somewhere else to get on line, TA-DA, there was the AT&T truck, at the foot of the hill! Jose let me out of the truck to get a conversation going. By 7:00 p.m, or so, we were back on line. It was our line… nothing more and nothing less. No floods, no cutting line sabotage, our line was too told and needed replacement.

Nine days no land line and no Internet… I don’t recommend it, unless everyone else in the world is also down.

The good news is that samples I had been discussing with my connections prior to the hubbub were still arriving. I just couldn’t get into on-line documents to process it all.

Now, I’m back again, and I don’t want to ever say, third time’s a charm. We also had satellite installed – back up for a back up.

Meanwhile, I did get to read the funniest book I’ve ever, ever laugh-out-loud read. I thought I was telling tales when I wrote Road Warrior Survival Guide… Doesn’t even hold a candle to what I just finished. Tomorrow’s blog will be for this one. It deserves its own title of Corkscrew, The highly improbable, but occasionally true, tale of a professional wine buyer. I can promise you, you don’t know anyone who’s more funny… Entertaining to the Nth degree, really jolly, bring on the thesaurus to find more synonyms. If there’s a glass ceiling for how much you can laugh, Peter Stafford-Bow has broken it.

For now, that’s what’s been going on. Jose and I are exhausted. Websites he was working on for launching, slowed to a screeching halt, my wine stories were bubbling below the surface, but I did get some unexpected down time to continue with the move-in… Wine Country time… Hurry up and wait…